A letter to 2018

Dear 2018,

I have to be honest and say you’ve probably been the second toughest year of my life thus far. It wasn’t all bad though. In fact, I’ve made so many great memories and have achieved so much, personally. I’d say my biggest accomplishment was starting Happy Go Meg - my literal happy place.

I started the year, January to the middle of April, in France. So thank you for that (even if it did come with a year's worth of backlash). It was my second season and I was placed in Courchevel which I can safely say is in my top three favourite places ever; it’s beautiful and even pretty magical. I lived with such great people (miss you so much cry), actually spent time skiing this season, tried so many new foods, cooked loads, took time to just stop and appreciate, had my best friend from home come to visit me, skied at night, went skidooing and jumped off a mountain with a parachute and a French man attached to me. He worked at the parapenting place, he wasn’t a straggler I promise.

Then arriving home in April and moving in with my ex-boyfriend (is it normal to still feel like a punch to the gut when I say that?) which was the start of the new, non-rep, life I now lead. I also started a real, 9-5 job in Bristol (I’m still loving having a routine) and even managed to squeeze in a holiday with two of my friends from my first season. We went to Portugal which is a place I’d never visited before and I loved it! We stayed in my friend's villa (I know, very snazzy) and just basically ate those custard tart things, sunbathed and drank boxed wine for the entire ten days. It was exactly what we needed. A real holiday instead of working for other people on their holiday. Rep life is a lot harder than people think you know.

Moving into may and the summer months of the year, I had a mixed time. Great memories, living with my boyfriend at the time, spending time with friends, working an easy enough job, not many stressors. The only struggle was our relationship - we both had personal things to work through so we just kind of clashed, I guess you could say. However it was a summer spent drinking wine, eating a literal tonne of nachos and jalapeños, listening to music every evening, sunbathing on the balcony, picnics, learning, reading and so many other great things. We also went on holiday to Spain and did all of the above but in 25-degree heat. With a pool. Which was pretty great.

September came around far too quickly however this is the month Happy Go Meg became an idea. I planned everything. The name, what angle I was going for, the kind of posts I wanted to write, the kind of people I wanted to reach, the colours, the website itself, my Instagram. And everything else that comes with having your own blog. I still feel so giddy when I say that. Maybe I’m just chocolate drunk from the box of Guylian I just ate (demolished). This month was kind of neutral I guess bar all the planning.

Coming into October. Now, this was a weird one. Happy Go Meg went live at the start of the month. I chopped all my hair off and became a member of the short hair club (‘Alexa, remind me to book a trim asap’), I turned 23 and I became newly single (however this was on and off so I’m not sure I can even write that?), I became so much more independent and lastly, I had my quarter life crisis. I felt rather lost in this whole life thing if I’m truly honest. I started to grieve the loss of my best friend and just felt shit, in all honesty. Lost is definitely the best term to describe it. Anyway, the month ended with birthday celebrations, new hair (who dis? [ sorry I had to]) and a newly created blog.

November I found my motivation flagged and I didn’t write too much as I wasn’t sure I was ‘good enough’ to have a blog. Side note for 2019, stop comparing your achievements and capabilities to others. I felt a bit weird in myself and my appearance - this was definitely from the botox trend of 2018. Not that I’m against it… I could do with botox for my laugh lines and crows feet. I thought you weren’t supposed to get wrinkles until you’re in your 40’s? Anyway, back to the letter Meg. I also just found myself in a constant state of stress. I was trying to enjoy life and appreciate how lucky I am but there was just something casting a shadow over everything. Not depression but just, something. You know the feeling? So actually, this was the crappiest month of the year I have to say. But, you have to have them to help you grow. As cliche as that sounds, it really is true.

2018, you then delivered December. A truly great month. My Happy Go Meg venture feels like it has truly begun. I have so many ideas and so much motivation. People are even coming up to me saying how much they love it and that they’re following my journey! I mean, granted it’s in the local pub where everyone knows everyone but that’s good enough for me. I also had my first photoshoot which was so much fun and I love the pictures so much! I got my hair dyed which can I just say, made me feel so much better. There really is no better feeling than walking out of a salon with a fresh colour. I suppose the birth of your first born or your wedding day must be up there but for now, a fresh colour is good enough for me. I got promoted which is great! That’s all I really have to say on that topic though as December has also been the month that I figured out my career - Digital marketing - which is so far from my job role now but that’s fine. Can’t expect miracles within a month now, can we? But at least I finally have a bit of a goal to work towards. I’ve managed to save up a little nugget of money to give me the freedom to potentially up and move my life to a new city. When I say little nugget I mean a Mcdonalds 6 pack of nuggets, not a 20 nugget share box. But it’s enough for my plans to kind of start afresh in the coming months. Did someone say moving vlog? And then the last thing to touch upon is Christmas. And what a bloody great Christmas it was. My first one home since 2015, all of the family together, a ridiculous supply of food and drink and lots of laughter. Since Christmas, I’ve gained 4lbs and a muffin top but we can’t have it all. I’ve also planned some great things for the blog (hope you’re as excited as I am), I’m planning a bit of a life change and I’ve decided to just slow down a little. I also just want to mention that I was a prosecco drunk 23-year-old at the pub with my friends to see in the new year, before realising I’m really not cut out for it and came home to cook marmite on toast to see the new year in instead.

So, 2018, all I really have to say is - Thank you, next.

Meg xx